Now when things are so simple I
want many complications.
The essence of life has been in
the rumination and contemplation
A free feather never finds a home
A stone however is bound to the
ground.
I want to love but I cannot love.
I want to say but I cannot
express.
I want to cry but suddenly tears
are seized
Emotions scare me,
emotionlessness is an expectation
Neither I am an absolute zero nor
am I a complete hundred.
Neither do I want silence nor do
I want a crowd…
Neither I want to be a child nor
do I want to be a grown up
I don’t want lust I don’t want
love either.
I question myself a lot; I
recently stopped facing myself…….
Now when I smile while walking; I
don’t know the reason behind it
Suddenly when I am back home, I
start missing the walk
Sometimes the journey is bliss
because the destination doesn’t want you.
I wish I Could be either hanged
or I could be the same I was a time back.
At least I could cry and yell my
heart out;
Had I been practical and
continued to be so…life would have been easier
But this transition has landed me
nowhere.
I feel strong and broken down at
the same time.
I pretend to be a bitch ; I dunno
how far I have justified it.
I want to get sloshed and I feel
like meditating…
I want to eat,but I enjoy the
pinch of hunger;
I find myself so beautiful
suddenly I think I am an ugly whore;
I feel I have the purest heart
then I think of it as a metal between my two soft breasts.
I miss God but suddenly I stopped
bending outside the temples;
I wanna go home but I want to
stay alone
This mid-state kills me like
hell…
Each day I die…only going closer
to my death.
Now when life is simple I believe
complication is an essence.
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